As cliche as it sounds, 2018 is going to be a year dedicated to myself.

Not just in the sense of fitness goals, but like obviously need that too. More so, working on myself from the inside out. 2017 showed me a lot about myself and the people I surround myself with. I've been killing myself to save friendships that aren't worth saving. Old friends, that you've known for 15 years, so you feel like you have to put the work in, even though they bring nothing to the table. New friends, who were there for a fun season, and then moved on.

I would find myself driving home and just crying that I had no girlfriends that could relate to me. I wouldn't get invites to happy hour after work, because I have a family, so "I probably couldn't come anyway", or plans that had been made in advance, would get bailed on. I just was feeling so inadequate. My husband would try to show empathy, but ultimately would be like, "why do you care?" At first, I would be annoyed, like he just didn't get it. Babes support babes, and I felt like I didn't have a support system, outside of what my husband had to offer. I realized I was trying to fit my lifestyle into theirs, late nights, drinks, dinners. I did all that when I was 21. As a 25 year old, this is the stage of life I should be in. A marriage, a family, a mortgage, a car payment, a career - so why was I feeling left out?

After several weeks of just feeling "alone", I started praying about it and I just felt this peace come over me, that I'm in a season where I am meant to be alone. Time to focus on my faith, my family and my job. Justin and I have really been investing in our church and finding a small group for the new year. We want to find friends who are in the same season of life as us and who will pour into us as brothers & sisters in Christ, as well as spouses and parents. I don't want friends that are going to reach out and say "Hey! What's up?", I need them to show up and say, "Hey! How's your marriage?" I want them to invest in me. Not on the surface, but really invest in my well-being.

OTHER 2018 RESOLUTIONS:
Pray more / Quiet time | We have been a lot better about praying at dinner time and really making it a routine to thank God for our blessings. I want to be more intentional about praying more throughout the day and praying for other people. Justin and I want to do a couple's devotional to kick-off the New Year and really dive head-first into God's word.
Be present at home | We are very rushed in the evenings during the week. We typically get home around 630PM, then I cook dinner, go through backpacks and we eat. We get about 20 minutes to chill before bath and bed, and I have been so bad about using that as my "down-time" to be on my phone. I am going to make a real effort to put my phone in the bedroom once I arrive home.
Get strong | Carter will be 3 in 2018, which really means it's time to get rid of that baby weight - mostly because is it even considered postpartum baby weight at this point? whoops. I want to make it clear that I don't want to just get skinny, I want to be strong. I want to feel confident and comfortable in the clothes I'm in. I've learned to not be caught up in the number on the scale, but to just feel good in my skin.
Be active | I don't necessarily mean exercise, but planning fun activities as a family. Hikes, bike rides, camping, and sports. Just getting outside and really unplugging from the hustle of the week.
Date nights | Justin and I used to be really good about going on a date once a week, either to dinner, a movie, or sometimes we would just get take-out and watching a show at home, uninterrupted. I would love to get back to that in 2018. Maybe I'll make a date jar? Or not.
Cook more | As much as Justin hates it when I try new recipes (mostly because I'm an awful cook), I really want to try new meals this year. I have gone back-and-forth on whether we should try HelloFresh or BlueApron, but I just don't know that it's worth it. We eat the same 12 meals for the most part in rotation, so I've decided to venture out in 2018. Sorry, honey.
Decorate the house | A big goal is to have our house fully decorated by this time in 2019. I wanted to start fresh with all new decor, but I just haven't decided what I am wanting. I don't want to decorate the living room, until we get new couches and I don't want to decorate our room until we decide on new bedding. It's just a whole domino effect.
Blog | I made a decision about two months ago that I am going to make a real effort to show my blog more attention. I really want to focus on building a brand and making this blog into something I am really proud of. I want to make sure that it focuses on everything that's important to me as a mom and a woman and that it ultimately will help someone else in need.

I am feeling very excited going in 2018 and I think it's going to be a great year for our family.

Happy New Year & go make your dreams come true!